UK Fashion, Beauty & Lifestyle Blog

Sunday, 21 January 2018

Embracing Change

I've always been terrified and excited about change in equal measure. Okay well that's a lie straight off.... So I've always been mostly terrified of change whilst also having a small - teeny - undercurrent of excitement. From the outside it might look like I've made some pretty dramatic.. albeit 'life changing' decisions in my early twenties but I think that in reality.. it mostly came down to what would create the least amount of change in my life. I decided to make a massive change in my career path and become a Paramedic after previously devoting my life to art because lol I thought it would give me more time with my then boyfriend. Ironically the new job showed me all of the things I was missing from my relationship and that ended shortly after.. then finding myself an older more musical model that had me in stitches every damn day. Okay so I've digressed but you get the idea.. I changed one part of my life so that the rest of it could stay exactly the same... comfortable.. unchallenged and easy. 
In fact.. when I look back.. a lot of my decisions were based on the safety and security of keeping everything the same.. even if I wasn't all that happy. Bizarre that isn't it? But I guess I always felt like it's better the devil you know. Maybe it would even be fair to say that I made most of my decisions to keep my relationship stable and to keep that the same. ( Dear Ally - well done for putting 9 years of your life on hold) Regardless, my point really is that I've always had huge dreams and aspirations for things but always felt held back by my own fear of change.. my own fear of 'going it alone', and my own fear that maybe the grass is greener on the other side. 
Now.. as much as I'm not about having regrets in life and truly believe that every experience has worth because of the lessons your learn from it, I've felt a bit of a stirring in my emotional core recently suggesting that I don't want to spend the next ten years doing the same thing - playing it safe.
I want to take chances, make risky decisions and put myself out there. I want to make more of an effort with my creative content and I want to make more of an effort with people. I don't want to remain stuck in one job, one city.. and I want to travel the world just like I'd always dreamed I would. 
Mostly.. I want to find myself ( Oh God have I ever sounded more cliche.. probably because :me ). I guess I just feel like I've been so stuck in my ways, so stuck in the safety of my little home, people group and city that I haven't ever really figured out what I am beyond that. Or at least.. I lost it somewhere along the way.
I want to reconnect with art and re-find my love of fashion and style. God I've played it safe with my style over the last few years... I guess I got a bit insecure in myself in general and basically just became a bit of a shadow of myself - not what it's about really. I didn't know if the content I wanted to create would be well received anymore and I wasn't sure of my place in the blogging world.
SO,  going forward, your girl here's got some big time plans for the next year and as much as I'm full of fear I'm also beyond buzzing to see what I manage to achieve with an altered mind set and a new passion for change.
Debenhams Coat*, COS Jumper (OLD - Similar here), Forever 21 Dungarees, Converse
So, in the spirit of all of the positive changes, I began this year by booking a trip to NYC with my girl Ellie and headed there on the 11th of Jan. ( Feel free to head over to my instagram to see what we got upto whilst over there) and with a new sense of creative inspiration I did a little bit of an online clothes shop before I went - because who doesn't love adding a trillion things to your basket without considering your dwindling bank balance - helloooooo next day delivery.
Anyway, I picked up this colour block coat from Debenhams with an urge to style it up with some casual denim .. casual pink denim.. and I freakin love it!

I'd love to know how you guys deal with change and if you embrace it or do anything within your power to avoid it.
I've missed ya pals, but I'm back with a vengence.
(Meant in the least aggressive way possible)

Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway


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